Dr. Travis Parry (00:01.38)
Welcome to the Travis Parry show. I am so privileged today to have Dan Metcalf with us here in studio. Dan is an internationally acclaimed performance coach, keynote speaker, author, and the creator of the total balance program and the Metcalf method, a groundbreaking approach to brain to body transformation. has an incredible story and a journey that I think we all need to hear and learn from. Dan, welcome to the show.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (00:31.47)
Travis, thanks so much for having me and trust me, I am learning all the time. So I'm excited to be here to learn too.

Dr. Travis Parry (00:37.326)
Awesome. Well, I had such a good, you know, pre show discussion about balance and the brain to body connection, your experience in business and also in, performance. So we're going to let you tell your story. Tell us, tell us how you got here, man. How did you, how did you go from, you know, some, some starring on, on stage to now being a performance coach and yeah, give us some details.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (01:04.654)
Yeah, thanks. Life is fascinating. I shouldn't actually be here if my life had gone where I thought it was going. I think we're all in that same kind of vein that things come at us. And I went from being an athlete back in England at professional soccer clubs to switching over to show business. I was doing a road mix to get supper for mountain climbing, because I was going to go to the Special Forces. decided I would sign up for the Royal Marines.

and the teacher there said, should become a dancer. I'm like a dancer, what do mean a dancer? I'm a man's man. But suddenly my life pivoted. Next thing I know, I'm in a musical theater, dance school, Lane Theater Arts just outside London. And a year and a half later, I'm in Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber shows. And so it was really fascinating how that whole thing came about. And I was touring, bodyguards at different times and life was great until...

I had an accident on stage in one of Lloyd Webber's shows, Starlight Express in Las Vegas, where I fractured my spine hitting a wall head first, and I was paralysed where the doctor said I'll be disabled for life. So look, the beautiful thing is things are thrown at us, and I have a saying that I love, why be a victim when you could be a hero? I just didn't know it at the time. We don't know what we can do until we tap into our brilliance.

So whether it's to do with business, whether it's to do with relationships, whether it's to do with the relationship with ourself, everything is possible to overcome and succeed provided we tap into ourselves at our own brilliance. And then to top that off in 2018, after being paralyzed and coming back and going on to become a head coach on the Olympic program and, you know, Nike coach, youth coach of the year and so many different things, I was racing the Ironman.

I was out on a bike training ride one day and a security guard brought a metal gate down on my head at about 22 miles an hour. I was knocked unconscious immediately. Then I hit the ground on the back of my head so hard it broke my helmet open. So I had a double impact. I was unconscious for about three minutes. Part of my brain died and I had to learn to talk and function and move again properly. And that was really where I would say the life I have now started and what a gift it is because

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (03:23.446)
I believe everything is a gift if we wrap it correctly.

Dr. Travis Parry (03:29.146)
Man, what a perspective. I've, I've ridden bikes, pro my entire life. love mountain biking. a big, not a big, as big a fan as some others for road riding, but man, what a, what a great exercise. And, know, I know a lot of people that just really, really love it, but I might, my father had several accidents on the road. he actually broke his neck.

And that was very tragic. So I can't imagine having to re learn to talk again. How was that? I mean, talk to us a little bit about that process. I mean, you said it just like you rolls off your tongue because you've experienced it and probably said it so many times, but I can't imagine what was that process like?

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (04:16.366)
But to begin with, I didn't really fully understand what was going on because my brain was damaged and I'm just trying to figure it out. I did go through major depression, PTSD, comfort eating. I'll be talking and I just suddenly stopped mid-sentence, not knowing I stopped because my brain went into freeze mode and people were telling me what was happening. I couldn't pronounce words properly and having come from a performing background to suddenly lose your whole sense of communication, which is really what entertainment is.

It hit me, but it didn't hit me right away because you think it's just gonna correct itself or you're not even cognitive. And then suddenly it was really tough to go through that and realize I have this challenge ahead of me. It's up to me to take on that journey and find the team. No one can do it for me. And the reality was very few people were actually helping me anyway. I could become a statistic very easily.

And we know in any walk of life, you know, when you think you're winning, you're not. And when you think you're losing, you're not. You've just got to keep your eye on the target and go for it.

Dr. Travis Parry (05:26.384)
So when we first were talking your experience, plus your knowledge around what's going on in the brain and how it functions, how it works fascinates me. I've always been interested in brain and neuroscience, psychology, how we think as individuals, as society, know, so, but, boiling this down to, know, you having this personal experience, how

How has this experience, well, I guess multiple experiences, right? How have these shaped you? How has this affected your resilience?

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (06:06.606)
Well, I shouldn't be here talking to you, not because again, you know, dying from a bike accident, I shouldn't be here if my life had gone the way we thought it was gonna go. And I really had to go and study the brain because again, I didn't wanna be a victim. And so going in and studying the brain changed the way that I see completely the power that we have to not just face adversity, but to overcome and rise to higher levels. As I was saying that I...

Love, is every level has its own devil in anything we're going through in life. There's going to be blocking points. And if we want to go to the next level, there's always that final piece that a majority of people will stop at and not get through because they're not tapping into the solution. They're focusing on the problem. And when we remove the problem and look at that as the lesson, then we can understand every lesson can be learned. How do I get to the next level through that?

holding us back. So I had to go and study the brain. That was my difference in life. If I didn't overcome the issue, I would be limited in my future and I believe we're limitless until we limit ourselves. So tapping into the brain, understanding the full power and again I don't even know the full power. Nobody knows the full power but studying, looking at neuroscientists, doing the research or reading the research they've done and then using it.

to then heal myself and I will say now that I'm smarter now than I was before the accident because I'm tapping into different parts. And I'll kind of cover it all by saying we are what we think. So if we think a certain way, the brain as a computer can only put out the information that's fed it. And one of the powers that I've realized is the messaging I give.

is exactly what I would get back. So raise the level of messaging and you'll raise the level of ability.

Dr. Travis Parry (08:09.828)
Well said every level has a devil, right? I, that that's going to stick with me probably forever. And I love that saying, but to, to know like what, what it is that we're trying to be challenged by. we can, be, be, able to overcome. I absolutely want to dive into, this limitless potential of our brain.

some people like to call it the supercomputer, you know, of our body. And that even doesn't do it justice. It just doesn't, you can't, because there's really nothing more than we can quite honestly as humans, understand. and we barely understand, you know, just part of how the brain operates. But in my book, Marion grow rich, I discuss the things that do limit us. And I think it's important that we talk on this concept of limiting beliefs.

And I'd love to get your take on, know, what, what, why do you think that business owners, we have these limits, where do they come from in your perspective and your research? and, and why do you think it's such a problem for us as business leaders, business owners, founders to hold onto these limiting beliefs?

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (09:25.356)
That's a great question. I love that question because it really takes me back to birth. All of us have gone through that not giving but certainly receiving. And it goes to one of my companies, Born Superhuman. I believe we're all born superhuman. When we're born, we have roughly 85 to 86 billion brain cells. And as an adult, we have almost the same amount. We can have neurogenesis, which is the generation of new brain cells while some die, but we won't really exceed 86 billion.

But as a baby being born between 85 billion and 86 billion brain cells, we got the same as adults. What we don't have is the wiring. That's called the synapse in the brain. How those brain cells wire and fire together would determine what we do. So as a baby, if they see something, they're gonna replicate it. If they hear something, they'll try and repeat it.

If they begin to envision something, they'll try and replicate it. You see Spider-Man climbing up a wall and babies are trying to climb up walls. We don't have the wiring. We're free. If everybody thinks back to when they were kids, the height and the fun and the imagination that they had, we were limitless. In fact, we were Superman and Wonder Woman. But then slowly over time, and this is where I think getting to your question in here, walls are built around us.

We don't build our own walls. We're told this is what to think, this is what we can do, this is realistic, this isn't, and this is your talent. And it started before we even got to school, but certainly at school it continued. So much of what we've done as business owners, and I've been fortunate enough to have four different businesses, we can only know what we know, and so we trust people that we think know more than we do.

Maybe they've had a great success in the business, but don't understand us, but they're telling us their solutions or their processes, but it doesn't fit us. And so what we do is we begin to limit ourselves in thought process, instead of trusting our instinct, read, study, listen to people and decide what you're going to take that will serve you, but you're not obligated to take everything or anything that doesn't.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (11:41.454)
Work with what we want to do. So I really think those walls are built around us then we feel contained then we grow fear or Another word procrastination we wait to find out and I'll tell you a real quick great story mark Burnett Mark Burnett owned the show. He created Survivor the apprentice the voice Super super guy he was with the paratroop regiment back in England and they will go out on a sortie one day before they had all the GPS

They came to a fork in the road, or it's actually in the mountains, didn't know whether to go left or right, so they sat there for a couple of hours deciding, trying to figure out on the maps which way to go. They decided to go left. They went left about 300 meters down there, it came a dead end. If they had gone right and made that decision, they would have been right. They would have found out. If they had gone left right away, they would have saved a couple of hours. And this is what Mark taught me, is don't procrastinate over decisions. Think about it.

Come up with a game plan, execute it, but be ready to pivot quickly if you realize that you're on the wrong path. You don't have to prove you're right, but take action from education. Don't procrastinate.

Dr. Travis Parry (12:59.236)
You know, what I learned from this is absolutely what I believe that, that faith is action and faith is stronger than fear. it's kind of how I look at it. And I talk a lot about that in my book, Mary and grow rich, but I love how what you really bring to the conversation is we were born limitless. It's that we acquired these limits.

a lot of times by comparison. Might you give an example of this in business that others could relate to? What would you suggest is something that you typically see that other high performers are limiting themselves by comparing to others?

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (13:46.274)
Yeah, so I founded a company that was, it was called 60 Up. We did $13 million of sales in the first 16 months. But something didn't feel right with me, but I kept going with it and going with it and trusting that we were on the right path because I had hired people or bought people in or had people part of the team that were more experienced than I was. And even if my gut instinct wasn't right,

In their opinion, I still had to listen to it. Well, I stepped away after 16 months, new CEO came in and I had to sit there and basically watch the company burn. And within six months, we were almost $2 million in debt. And then I came back in to try and save it. This is to do with the total balance company that we have now. I knew I wasn't ready to go anywhere.

I wasn't ready to handle, not even a company that was flyin', but a company that was now about to go out of business. So I went to Wharton Business School and studied, graduated as their exemplary student at the executive course. And this is what I learned. The very first thing they teach is the most important thing for success is team. The second most important thing for success is team. And the third most important thing for success is team.

So I had a great team to launch because we launched and we did great. What I had was a team that didn't know how to scale or recognize where it was going good or bad. And so I think when you look at people in business and it goes to everything, when you have a gut instinct that something isn't right, address it. It doesn't have to be aggressive, but address it and don't move on until you're satisfied with the result. Cause ultimately I was responsible. I was the founder, the creator.

you know, the CEO, the president, the largest shareholder in the company, I wasn't satisfied, but I kept myself quiet. And I really think that the old adage, hire slowly, fire fast, I think is critical to anyone in a business. And don't bring people in to relieve you of work if they're not the right person, because you end up having to do their work and oversee them. It's better to do the work yourself.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (16:02.734)
Then make sure you got the right person coming in because I see it all the time we make poor decisions off of emotional need or As you so nicely put it Fear that governs our movement and that's actually part of the brain anyway, so you know if the fight or flight the sympathetic system That's emotional that affects us

Dr. Travis Parry (16:24.824)
Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. I mean, psychology, we explore the sympathetic, parasympathetic, sympathetic responses to the brain, how it works, under stress, especially. All right. So Dan, if I was coming to you and I have got some limiting blocks and beliefs, we all do. I, you know, I have some systems, I have some ways to help people, my own clients, but I'm, I want to hear about your systems.

What have you learned? How, how do you help others to reprogram their brain so that they can get rid of these limiting beliefs, these fears, these blocks, whatever you want to call them so that they can really just tap into their full potential. Maybe give us the outline of what you teach, not all, you know, specifics, but give us some of the parameters, the pillars, the framework that you typically operate under.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (17:19.982)
Now that's great, and this is where I get excited. You can see my smile comes up on my face because transformation is what we're really looking for from where you were to where you dream to be. So we have to do lot of clarifying questions because the issues we have today didn't start yesterday, they started years ago. So our limiting beliefs come.

from our subconscious, not our conscious. Because consciously we can try and fight through, but our natural reaction is the subconscious. So I have to go back and find out how is your brain operating? What are the things that you don't even know that you're doing that we have to make them conscious? I have to consciously find the subconscious action. Then we have to make the subconscious, the conscious work to then replace, become the subconscious so we automatically go.

It can be something as simple on the boys side, a coach once told you, you'll never be good enough. And so what we do is we end up becoming, having to prove, which means as you were talking about, we're living in a sympathetic state where it's either fight or flight. And we know that we think best when we're relaxed, when we're in control. Stress can be a really good thing because it can be actionable reaction to stress, but not if we're living in fear.

Then when I go back in and this was really my specialty coming from my own brain injury is how do we rewire the synapse? And we talked about it a little bit earlier. A baby will copy and build those lines of habits through repetition. What we need to remember, practice doesn't make perfect. Practice makes permanent. And so if we're doing the same thing again and again and we consciously try to change at

thought process without changing the subconscious, we would naturally default back to the limitations. This can be in business, in relationships, in personal success, health, wellness, happiness. And so I had to go back in and this one's so passionate because I've done it for myself. I've done it for so many people, but I had to start with myself. I've lived it. If I want a different outcome, I have to change the way I'm approaching it and everything we do.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (19:39.764)
starts with our conscious thought that activates the subconscious reaction.

Dr. Travis Parry (19:45.991)
Wow. Well said. Really, really well said. what I like to tell people is that it's possible. It's possible to retrain the brain. And I mean, you're, you were literally living proof, Dan of someone who had suffered an actual brain injury and was able to, you know, go through and, and heal and, God willing be able to get to the place where you are now. I mean, I would have never known.

Unless you told like, never known you had a issue with like learning how to re-speak and learn some of these process, I would have just never guessed it. But learning at this level, like I think of my own kids who every day it's so fun to see their personalities develop. I'm like, oh, she learned that from her older sister. Whoops, she learned that from mom. She learned it from dad, you know.

And it's just so fun because they're just sponges and they're just learning so many things. But what I love is this idea that yes, if you've learned it, means you can unlearn it and you can learn something new. So I really appreciate you bringing, you know, this up. What would you say is the biggest issue that, that business owners face in trying to relearn in trying to reprogram their brain? What do they do that goes wrong? What do they do that, that maybe slips them up in?

preventing themselves from trying to reprogram that synapse.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (21:15.362)
think it comes from we become our environment. And when we're in, we've heard the saying, you become the sum of the five people you spend the most time with, right? So, but I go further than that. We become our environment. But the most important environment is the one inside ourselves. That's the one we don't address. We're so busy looking out either for, as you were talking about, we wanna have the rewards, want people to be proud of us and think that...

Yeah, we're successful. So we're so busy trying to impress others that we've forgotten ourselves. And so if you can take care and start giving yourself time to invest into yourself, we invest into our businesses, we invest into the dreams, the goals, the vision, and yet we're ignoring ourselves. That most people will spend 70 % of their lives trying to earn money at the expense of their health.

and then spend the last 30 % of their life spending all their money trying to regain their health. And we'll say, we don't have enough time. But the difference is, we don't have the discipline of time. If we structure it where we take care of ourselves, give ourselves, whether it's gonna, I'm gonna spend 15 minutes a day reading and learning. I'm gonna listen to a podcast that inspires me to gain more knowledge. I'm gonna go, I can't get to the gym for an hour like I'd like to.

but I'm gonna get up and walk at sunrise every morning for 15 minutes instead of staying in bed longer. These, I'm gonna hydrate throughout the day because as a head coach on the Olympic program, I knew that 3 % dehydration can lead to up to 20 % underperformance and we're all in the game of life, but we don't spend time working on our mental strength. The programs that I teach is like going to the gym, but for your brain.

Until it becomes so powerful. We know that the smartest people in the world. We're told by the top scientists We're only using about 8 % of our brain capacity Well, how much more it's impossible to use a hundred percent. I'll just state that it's impossible to use a hundred percent of your brain capacity Because the brain will shut down parts of it once it knows for example once we learn a language Unless you learn a second language the brain goes. Okay. I know how to communicate I don't need to so we'll put the energy somewhere else

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (23:37.624)
but I really believe business owners invest in you, create the environment inside, and maybe the greatest thing was learning the word no. See, the most powerful word for me in the world is yes. Did I get the job? Do you love me? Did I earn what I wanted to get? Did I achieve? Did I take the steps? Yes, yes, yes. But we were always taught to fear the word no. Would you like to buy this? No, okay.

If I was selling you something, Travis, in here and I said, hey, you know, I've got this to sell you and you don't want it, but you go, well, let me think about it because you don't want to hurt my feelings. And I'm like, okay, great. And I hold onto the idea that I could get the sell. What I didn't want to hear was the word no. Well, I love the word no, because the most valuable thing we have in life is time. Right. People will say my family, my...

When time's gone, it's all gone. What we do with our time shows what's most important to us. So the word no is so invaluable. I love it. It's a capital N, capital O, and it stands for next opportunity. And that's where we come in again and say, I don't have time to waste while I'm trying to convince somebody to believe in me or my product. And I feel they're not gonna say yes, but I don't wanna hear no.

That's the time I could have invested in the next step. And so when you fall in love with the word no, not from I want to hear it, but I'm not scared to hear it, it opens up for us to go and do the things that drive us.

Dr. Travis Parry (25:15.864)
So good. Well said. You know, I feel like we're just bantering back and forth about what I try to coach my clients on almost every day. And that's this idea of balance, right? Well, you mentioned is time. So my first book, achieving balance was all about where do you spend your time?

And balance is not an equilibrium of between work and home. It is more complicated than that, but it's where you put your priorities. And most people say, well, I, you know, I'm a Christian, I believe in God and I'm close to God. Yet when I asked them to track how much time they actually spend there, it's very minimal. Or I love my family. Well, great. Well,

How much time do you actually spend with them? Not looking at your phone, watching TV. you know, it's, it's crazy. Cause then they get this slap in the face of, Whoa, cause where I put my time, where I make the time is where my priorities are. And so they see this switch and it does help create a better psychological balance of yes, I'm putting energy into these things that I know are really valuable for me.

And now I feel better that stress, that, that, that shame, the, just the cognitive dissonance between, know this to be true yet I'm not doing it. Tends to just give them so much peace of mind. You're absolutely right. The number one most valuable thing we have in life is time. It's when it's over. It's over. And none of us know it could be tomorrow. It could be today. It could be 20 years from now. but it's, it's absolutely the most important,

Yeah, I would say commodity, but also asset. is an asset. the other thing you mentioned here that I really want to touch on is your boundaries. You know, you call it saying no, absolutely. You have to say no to things that are lesser priority so you can work on the higher things. but if you've learned to try and be a people pleaser, if you've learned that, you know, you want everybody to follow you and coddle you, it's hard to say no.

Dr. Travis Parry (27:24.474)
because you're more afraid of what people will think of you. that's actually a limiting belief right there. It's a limiting belief of, I can't achieve the things that I need to if I tell people no, because I want everybody to like me. And I find most strong, courageous leaders in business, they've figured out how to say no to most things. So this is a great, great reminder.

Dan, I know there's a lot we could continue talking about here today. I love this, this framework that you've really discovered. It works so well with my audience. What we've been talking about for years here on the show. if people that are, you know, they're high performers, business owners, they want to reach out to you and get more help. or they want to connect with you and follow you and learn more about you. what, would you say?

Before we give them how to connect with you. What would you say the one two or three things that they could do right now? Today to start doing simple Actionable items that they could do to try to see if this would work for them

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (28:31.63)
So the first thing I would say is look after your health. That's the first thing I look at because you can't have a sick doctor looking after a patient. They're gonna make the patient more sick. So my first set up is what are you doing for you? Are you overweight? Are you eating poorly? Are you hydrating? And people go, that's not, I want the end result. Well, it's part of the end result because we can't be successful on the journey if we're not prepared for it. It's gonna hold us back.

The second thing that I would look at is say, okay, what is it that you're after? Because until you understand what they're looking for, you can't help plan the journey ahead. And it's gotta be their journey, not my journey. Everything I teach, that I speak about, that I've learned is because I've suffered. I've gone along those roads. Everything from forming businesses to being unhealthy to suffering from sickness to having successful companies to losing, to learning, to rebounding.

and coming back stronger than ever because of the lessons. So I wanna know what's your journey you're after? Because if I can't help your journey, I can say no again, because no again on the other side is a capital N, capital O, and it stands for never obligated. I'm not obligated to help you if I can't. In fact, the worst thing I can do is pretend. And then the third thing that I would look at is say dream biggest.

Because don't dream big, dream biggest. What is your ultimate goal? But don't make it money. You can make money part of it. But what is your ultimate goal? What's the vision for you, for your life, for your family, for your business, and how do you collaborate them all? know, Mark Burnett had a great conversation with me. I go back to him again, because he was a great mentor for me. And he said, you can't be great at everything. He would talk about being

You know from a wife point of view can't be the greatest mother the greatest businesswoman and the sexiest wife all at the same time because it's gonna drag and you're gonna burn yourself out trying to be What's the order of what's most important to you? And then how do you segment the days in and I remember mark I was shooting a documentary and I'll keep this short, but I shoot a documentary with mark. I had an issue with a business that that he had connected me to and

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (30:56.866)
We were down at the Malibu Chili Cook-Off and he said, how's it going? I said, Mark, I got this. He goes, tell me what happened. And I said, well, you know, this, this. goes, Dan, tell me exactly what happened because either you're an effing idiot or they're an effing idiot. And my first reaction was, well, he just called me that. And I took it offensively. Like, why would you call me that? I'm not an idiot. I'm super smart. But I understood I wasn't looking at myself, honestly.

I was being the good guy, the nice guy. I wasn't willing to not be the pleaser. And so I think when everything comes together, what is it that you're sacrificing to try and be the person that you want to be, but in the wrong environment? So be your biggest critic, but also be your biggest supporter. Understand we're not all born perfect. We're born superhuman. We have the power. What are you going to do to tap into it? Because when you die,

No one's going to be worried about you anymore, so don't worry about them while you're still here.

Dr. Travis Parry (32:00.507)
Well said. And I appreciate these, you know, actionable items, things that we can do right now that we can try and, and, you know, decide on Dan, if, if they do want to connect with you, they want to learn about your books and your podcast and, potentially even being, you become your client or have you speak where, where can they find you?

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (32:25.378)
Yeah, I'd love to help. Again, my passion is helping. I've helped over 70,000 people in different arenas through my coaching. And there's nothing better than one person at a time. It's not numbers, it's impact. You can go to bornsuperhuman.com. That's my website. And then you can reach out to me through there. You'll find different pages on there, get in contact with Dan. And again, just go through the program, just read about it, because a lot of the stuff is very simple. The magic we seek.

is in the work we avoid. And what I teach is what you've already got, it's just hidden. And again, sometimes people say, well, this is so simple. That's the point. There's no magic solution or tablet or secret out there. hear this secret and this secret. It's all the truth we just sometimes don't wanna face, or it seems so simple, we don't believe it will work. You work, your system works, your brain works.

We just got to tap into the greatest unique you and have you trust you to step forward.

Dr. Travis Parry (33:28.742)
Wonderful. Thank you for being here today, Dan. I think this has been an absolute, uh, just pleasure to talk to somebody who not only understands it from a, you know, intellectual standpoint, but has lived it and has seen it, um, in your own life again. Um, I love the fact that you teach transformation, but also that you have this resilient background and you know, you really walk your walk. So thanks for being here on the show.

Dan Metcalfe - Born SuperHuman (33:58.52)
Jarvis, thanks so much and thanks for what you do for so many people because one life is all we need to have made ours incredible.

Dr. Travis Parry (34:05.649)
Wonderfully said, thank you again. And if you've enjoyed this, definitely like, share, subscribe, do all the things. next time, remember, live life on purpose together.