Dr. Travis Parry (00:02.414)
Hello and welcome to the Travis Parry show. I am here with John Nevecker. John was born and raised in Sandy, Utah. He is a financial advisor with equal strategies, LLC with over 20 years of experience. He's received exceptional professionalism awards in the financial services industry throughout his career and loves to serve others. John was first introduced to the family bank system in 2018 and spent several years.

researching and helping clients implement family banks while writing the book, the family bank, the key to generational wealth from 2020 to 2022. He subsequently founded TFB strategies, LLC, and currently serves as president. And his passion is making things better and finding creative solutions to stubborn and complicated problems. John met his wife, Whitney on a blind date in Washington, DC in April, 2012.

They were married in July, 2013 in Salt Lake city, Utah, John and Whitney are parents to eight vigorous young children with two sets of twins. My goodness, my friend. Welcome to the show.

John H Nebeker (01:10.721)
Thank you.

Dr. Travis Parry (01:13.03)
it's awesome. Yeah. I always forget that. I'm like, yes, you guys have two sets of twins and, having one, like we even had a time in our life where we thought we were going to have a set of twins and it just, yeah, it just took us a back. So you're, you're a good man. Thank you for making time to be here with us today. I'd love to, to know how did you get here? Why, why, you know, pursue this family bank thing. Tell us your career, you know, in a few minutes here, how did you get to what you're doing?

today.

John H Nebeker (01:43.255)
Yeah, well I did everything I could not to be doing what I'm doing today. My father is a financial advisor for 50 years plus and after college I had an internship in Europe waiting for me. I was gonna study international business and he approached me and he said, why don't you work with me and you'll make enough money to go there anytime you want. Plus you'll be able to stick around here and find a spouse. anyway, so didn't find a spouse for a long time but.

Luckily, I did find her eventually. But working with my dad actually was probably one of the greatest blessings that I'd ever experienced in my life. He's such a wise person and has terrific insights on any subject. so he's retired now. I miss him as my day-to-day business partner, but love what we do. To answer your question, how I got into what we do with the family bank, I was there rinkside with

a lot of estate planning cases that he was doing in particular, he'd bring me in on those. And without exception, no matter how much planning was done or how much money was involved, I kept seeing the same results. I kept seeing families fighting over money, children and grandchildren being entitled or not even needing the money in the first place, wondering what to do with it. And it just broke my heart, especially when these strong families who were

good Christian people wouldn't talk to each other or in some cases wouldn't go to each other's weddings or funerals. And I just thought there's gotta be a better way. But I was introduced to the family bank concept a few years after being introduced to it individually where my wife and I were gonna go on a trip for two weeks without our kids. We got a trust in place. I started feeling uneasy about it and I didn't know why.

And luckily, a couple of years later, an attorney reached out to me and said, hey, I'm putting this together for my family. Can you help me? And so I was really intrigued by that, and that began my whole process of learning more about what the family bank is.

Dr. Travis Parry (03:53.986)
You know, as you mentioned in your bio, you'd like to try to figure out complicated problems. And quite honestly, in my research, what I've been doing as a coach and a planner a long time ago, a mentor now is, is money and how complicated that is for families to navigate, to discuss, to plan all of the details. so I, I love your book. I've read it several times. We, you and I, you know,

have had lots of conversations about this, but John, why, why is it so complicated for families to get along with money? What are the major players? are the major factors that you've seen as you've helped and throughout your career, that, that, that you see as the complicated problem that you're trying to help with.

John H Nebeker (04:47.191)
Well, it's interesting you ask that. I don't view money itself as a problem. I view it as an accelerant. And in the truest sense of the word, when you add money to a problem, it makes the problem bigger. When you add money to a good life or a good situation, it makes it better. And so what I've discovered is that money in most families tends to exacerbate the problems.

because most of us just don't know what to do with it, and they don't know how to use it properly. And anyway, so I found that just by viewing it as a tool, and not viewing it as something to be afraid of, it really helps kind of bridge that gap.

Dr. Travis Parry (05:33.185)
So that's, that's fantastic that you've personally been able to see that. but what, what do other families see? Like what, what are their struggles? What, are other business owners struggling with while trying to get their estates to the next generation, you know, without trying to, you know, entitle or create the problems that you've seen in other families. Maybe let's, let's go there for a minute.

John H Nebeker (05:52.684)
Yeah, absolutely. So after 20 years, I've worked with thousands of people and a lot of them have been business owners, very successful folks. And what I found is they typically have a number of different principles that they follow for being disciplined with money, for being successful in business. And they're anxious to send those or to share those principles with their fellow family members. The trouble is that the family

with most of the time, with some exceptions, the family didn't go through what they went through. So they don't know how it is to really struggle financially, to be in a one-bedroom apartment. And like in my dad, in my mom's case, my dad worked at Brigham Young University at the Cannon Center, where they had a cafeteria back in the day. And he would literally eat the food that was left over on the plates that people would hand back to be washed, because they were that poor.

And so you have this boomer generation that has been very successful, generally speaking, and they don't know what to do with it. In fact, the latest estimates are that over $90 trillion is going to change hands in the next 10 to 20 years as the boomers die off. And naturally, those folks are wondering, what do I do with this money?

And a lot of times, unfortunately, boomers have already seen their children and grandchildren demonstrate behavior patterns that they are entitled or a little bit selfish, or at the least a little ungrateful. And so they're wary about just giving people money. Well, that's what everybody does. That's what everybody's been doing for hundreds of years. And with rare exceptions, that tends to just go on. typically, their children are older.

And so they don't even need the money. A lot of times they're retired by the time mom and dad die. So it presents this real problem in a family setting where you've got competing values or lack of values or less values, I guess you could say in the younger generations, less experience and all this money and all the fruits of their labor, but not knowing what to do with it. And that's where the family bank can come in and not only give people's training, which is essential,

John H Nebeker (08:17.569)
but also the financial tools in order to make those dreams come true.

Dr. Travis Parry (08:23.565)
Yeah, you just hit the jackpot on this one. The wealth transfer is the largest ever in history that is taking place now and will continue to take place over the next, you know, several years, decade or so. And you know, this, this is on a lot of people's minds, not only the ones who are transferring the money, but the family members who might be receiving the funds or, not. Right.

Let's talk about on the receiving end. What, what are typically some of the issues that you've seen with family, with children, grandchildren, et cetera, family members who receive an inheritance, who don't receive inheritance after they thought they were. Let's talk about some of those issues on the, the receiving end.

John H Nebeker (09:13.355)
Yeah, absolutely. Well, as I mentioned already, a lot of times those who receive an inheritance don't need it because they've already made their lives and their parents typically have lived to an older age, the grandparents or parents, whoever's passing away. And so they don't really need the money to help them at that time. The other thing that I've seen is sort of the wanton consumption of wealth. And what I mean by that is things that people would normally not do with their own money.

they give themselves license to do when it's other people's money. In this case, mom and dad or grandma and grandpa's money. Now, it's not always a bad thing. Some people are trained and they know what to do with the money. But in most cases, when people don't have a plan, they essentially are planning to consume the money. And in terrible cases, it can actually hurt them when the family members who passed away would love to help them. If people have addictions or...

issues with other family members in particular, they can start having problems with that. The worst that I've ever seen, and I actually talk about it a little bit in the book, are families from sort of some fairly wealthy families where the parents passed away and then the children were fighting over the estate. And a lot of times it's because the estate documents, in this case, trusts, wills, sometimes they're business entities.

were not updated to reflect what was actually happening in the family. Sometimes you have family members working in the family business. Sometimes you have others who are not. Regardless, there feels like there's an imbalance sometimes. And then the worst thing that I've seen is then they just stop talking to each other. And so then they hire attorneys to do the talking for them. And that's the best way to ruin relationships and to drag things on. I've met so many people where I've told them, they've asked me about

Should I sue my brother or my uncle who's the trustee of this trust? And I was asking, well, what's the amount of money? And there were 50,000, 100,000 here and there. And I say, it's not worth it. I said, you can't count is the sleepless nights or the days, the hours, maybe days, months that you're having bad feelings for other people. And you're carrying that around with you. And you're torturing yourself with those feelings. It's just not worth it.

John H Nebeker (11:37.811)
especially when it's a member of your family with whom you want a long-term relationship and you would otherwise if this dumb money weren't in dispute.

Dr. Travis Parry (11:47.597)
Yeah, I mean, really great points here as you've been talking about this concept, you know, it's the, human cost, right? The family relations and how strained they are. you know, I've seen this happen with my own family, with other families I've worked with, you know, for, decades as, as they've either inherited or didn't inherit or confusion about who's going to take the business over. It gets really messy. Really, really messy.

So talk to us, how does, you know, how does the family bank solve this? Talk to us about the framework around the family bank and maybe a little of history where this might be coming from.

John H Nebeker (12:26.423)
Yeah, so sort of backing up a little bit. one of the knee-jerk responses to family problems with money, a lot of times, especially with wealthy people, is to say, well, let's just give it all to charity. Let's not give it to our kids and grandkids because they're acting spoiled. So we're just going to give it to this outside institution that hopefully will use it properly and help other people. And then there's all that warm, touchy-feely, sometimes get your name on a plaque on a building.

And there's all that fun stuff that comes with charitable giving. And don't get me wrong, charitable giving is wonderful. Americans are the most generous of anybody in the world for how much we give on a regular basis. Now that being said, remember we're all human and people who run charities are also human. And so if your family members may have susceptibility or there's a risk of them acting entitled and improperly using this money,

The same is true with the people who run charitable organizations. And so I make that point all the time. was like, recognize that there are many charities for whom only a small fraction of their received contributions go to those who are needy. I think the...

Dr. Travis Parry (13:40.901)
And I appreciate, appreciate bringing this up because there are a lot of people who think that is the solution. I'll just give it all away. They preach it. I've interviewed several on this podcast years ago that that's even what they do is charitable giving and they want to give everything away, die with nothing. I mean, there's a lot of this mentality, but you bring up a really good point in your book. Just that, that will hold on. You're giving it away, but you're not accounting for.

John H Nebeker (13:46.315)
Yeah.

John H Nebeker (13:58.136)
Thank

Dr. Travis Parry (14:09.804)
the same problems that are ultimately exist in any, even a nonprofit, right? No organization is perfect. In addition, think another thing that you brought up too, which I 100 % agree with is this idea about stewardship. Well, if you're just passing the buck to someone else for the stewarding of this, know, tranche of money, you know, these assets, then are you even teaching your children, grandchildren or whoever that you, you know,

how to not be entitled, right? Or, or, or take the money and exacerbate this into some lavish lifestyle that might destroy them, uh, because they've never had this amount of money in their life. So yeah, thank you for bringing that up. I'll let you continue on telling us a little bit about, you know, how, how this does work and the history behind that.

John H Nebeker (14:57.335)
Yeah, so you get past that knee-jerk response, right? And then they say, well, what else is there? What can I do with my money that can make sure that it's used wisely, as I would hope that a charity would, but also give opportunities to my family members? And I say, well, the only way to give your children everything is to give them nothing. And what you do when you do that, when you set up a family bank, you're creating opportunities with accountability.

The bottom line, the way that a family bank works is essentially you keep the money altogether when you pass away. You wouldn't say that there are no inheritances. Most people actually want to give something to their kids, but it's not the majority of the estate. It's just a little something to say goodbye. But the bulk of the estate stays within a trust. And depending on the state where you're in, some of these trusts can go out perpetually forever. In the state of Utah where I'm at,

the expiration date is 1,000 years. And so that's kind of overwhelming when you think about it. Like you could create an entity and fund it for 1,000 years. So that could benefit hundreds and maybe even thousands of your descendants who aren't even born yet if you have the right planning. So the way a family bank works is it's, again, the infrastructure is in a legal document of trust. And typically it's an irrevocable trust. So I can talk about the differences about that in a minute.

And then you put in language into that trust that defines how the family bank operates, who the family bank board is, what their responsibilities are, what the opportunities and obligations of the beneficiaries of the trust would be. Like family members who are yet unborn who come through the line of those who are living today. And all of that is kind of spelled out.

Now there's a lot that's not spelled out because you don't want to bind the hands of too many generations in the future. But you want to give them enough guidance so they can make good decisions and then figure stuff out on their own as you go along. So that's the start of it. And then you've also got to have the right financial assets inside of your family bank that can grow perpetually, ideally with some tax advantages so that you're not getting hosed with taxes year in, year out because trusts are always in the highest.

John H Nebeker (17:23.989)
marginal income tax bracket. And there's a number of different ways you can do that, the way that most of these families, particularly the Rockefeller family has figured this out, they're a very wealthy billionaire family, is by buying life insurance on members of the family as they are born. And so you have these trusts that are in place, they have lots of assets, the two main assets inside of most family banks that I've researched, that I've worked with, and I've set up.

our real estate and life insurance.

Dr. Travis Parry (18:00.043)
Yeah, fascinating. this is, this is a solution, right? To keep it within a family bank. but, moving money from generation to generation isn't always like the only thing it can be used for, right? What are the uses and frameworks does the family bank have to, offer those who, want to have access to it, but don't want uncle Sam to be taxing them on everything.

John H Nebeker (18:25.269)
Yeah, so that's the advantage of life insurance is, and people always ask me, why would I buy a bunch of insurance on my grandchildren and great grandchildren as they come along? And then those who are unborn, if the family is continuing this system, why would they buy insurance on them? Well, there are all these nice features of life insurance. Number one, you've got protection. You've got to have an insurable interest. There's got to be some economic loss when that person passes away. And typically in a family setting, that's no problem. That's an easy...

think that to justify and then you've also got a with these permanent policies you've got a cash account that's associated that builds up over time issues you've very a fairly competitive rate of return but the big thing you already mentioned is is the tax-free status of it life insurance is one of those assets that is able to grow without tax and as long as you don't exceed the

the cash value of it and the loans and there's a lot of different stuff that you can avoid. It's very avoidable. You'll never ever see any tax on it, neither on the cash nor the final death benefit. As long as it's structured properly, you'll never ever see any tax on it. That's very advantageous for a trust where it's at the highest tax bracket. Now other people say, well, can I use other things? Like, can I use stocks, bonds, other cash equivalents? Absolutely.

And if you're consistently getting double digit returns or even higher, then use those things. If they ever change the tax status on life insurance, maybe something will be better than life insurance. But for the last few hundred years, as the Rockefellers have shown, that has been the best place for the liquid cash. The other part I already mentioned was real estate. A lot of these families have legacy properties. Sometimes they generate income, sometimes they don't.

And in the case of them generating income, a lot of times you've got to do something with that money. And so they will either make distributions in the form of outright gifts or grants, which are basically loans that don't have to be repaid. Or a lot of times they just do charitable donations. The Rockefeller family in particular, they give about $50 million to charity every year from the gains that they have in their family bank trusts. So there's all kinds of things.

John H Nebeker (20:46.923)
But those are the three ways that money can come out of the trust is loans that we already talked about, low interest, it's lower than where you'd get anywhere else, grants, worthwhile activities, charitable activities even, and then gifts. In some cases, there are some allowable things, money that can be given to future generations for qualifying events.

Dr. Travis Parry (21:10.698)
Yeah, sounds, sounds idealistic, right? Sounds in theory, like a wonderful thing. I know you've put these in place. You've seen them in place. You've done your research on it. You've written the book on it in your book. You also, mentioned another family with an R it didn't go so well for them. Why don't you tell us a little bit about the Rothschilds and others who, you know, have, have tried to do something similar, but have, have, have really kind of messed everything up for lack of better words.

John H Nebeker (21:38.08)
Yeah. So I do a compare and contrast between two contemporary families. It's the Rockefellers and the Vanderbilts. And the Vanderbilts are kind of the poster child for what not to do with your money. When Cornelius Vanderbilt passed away, he had roughly 200 million to his name. And then within seven years, his son, William, doubled that.

Dr. Travis Parry (21:50.048)
Vanderbilts, thank you.

John H Nebeker (22:07.319)
So here's $400 billion that's there. Now, he died so quickly and the family had no plans set up that that money was just distributed to his heirs. And within only a few decades, when all the Vanderbilt descendants came to Vanderbilt University for a family reunion, there wasn't a single millionaire among them. 400 billion gone.

And there have actually been a few Vanderbilts who have risen to prominence on their own. One of the most notable ones is Anderson Cooper of the CNN network. But he had to do that all on his own. His mother was a Vanderbilt. Now you contrast that with the Rockefellers. They saw what was going on with all the other wealthy, industrial-age billionaire families. And they essentially said, not in our family. So when JD Rockefeller

passed away and his son John Jr. inherited the majority of the wealth, he said, we're going to set up trusts and other business entities to shepherd this money. We're going to continue dad's philanthropic mission to be very generous with the poor. And we're also going to make this money available to everybody in the family, but through low interest loans exclusively.

And then that will be a way for them to accomplish their dreams. And so if you think about it, like any business owner that gets started in business needs capital. You know, can have, everybody's got ideas. Everybody knows how to work hard. Most people do, especially entrepreneurs. They work harder than anybody. But what they really lack is that third ingredient for success, business success, which is capital. And so here you have access to large amounts of capital.

at low cost, low interest that's being paid to a trust, your family trust. And guess what? Who is the banker? It's your family members. Generally, they are on the bank board. And so they're the ones who know you the best. They know what your FICO score is, essentially. You you've worked with them. And they've seen how you do with money before this, before you need a loan. So they can be wise about how much they give to you and at what rate and then what the terms of the...

John H Nebeker (24:26.689)
arrangement are.

Dr. Travis Parry (24:29.515)
So you talk about these concepts of, you know, trusts and financial, assets, real estate insurance. And you also mentioned these board of directors. how, how can these framework pieces of the family bank help children, grandchildren not be entitled, but enabled.

to use the money wisely. Cause that is the biggest thing that as I'm interviewing, a lot of business owners about this concept, but entitling their children, like how do they, you know, give inheritance? How do they teach their children? This is the thing that keeps coming up is the sense of entitlement among the wealthy or those who have earned it, but they don't want to turn around and let their children not experience lessons that got them to where they are in the first place. The whole millionaire next door kind of concept.

How does the family bank help with that?

John H Nebeker (25:25.739)
Yeah, great question. It depends on the family, depends on the child. You everyone's different. I can just speak from personal experience with my oldest boy. He's 11 now. A few years ago, we lived in the state of Arizona and he came up to me and he said, Dad, all the kids in the neighborhood have these fancy electric scooters and bicycles. And I said, that's great. Okay. Well, how much do they cost? And he gave me the number and it was a lot. And he said, would you buy one of these for us?

And I said, well, if I buy that for you, then I feel like I got to buy something comparable for everybody else. And I don't want to do that. And plus, if I buy it and you break it, then what? And so there's all these different things you go on your mind. So what I said to him is I said, hey, we're in Arizona. We have a bunch of fruit trees, citrus fruit trees. What if you go and pick those oranges and lemons and all the things off the tree?

And you make a little business to deliver that fruit to everybody in the neighborhood. It's essentially, I mean, it's money on your money tree. It's just growing outside. And admittedly, I helped him a lot with picking the fruit. But so what he did was he got a family bank loan from me and my wife because he needed money to buy bags and then also little cards that he'd put in and ribbon that he would put on each each bag of fruit. And so.

And he also didn't have access to a vehicle himself. When we had large orders, we had one order that was several hundred dollars that was 30 minutes drive from there. Anyway, long story short, he was able to earn that money himself. With a little bit of assistance, the first thing he did was he paid us back the amount of money we had lent him to buy all the materials he needed. know, and marketing wise, we helped him develop a little flyer that he ran around the neighborhood with his siblings.

and put with, you know, scotch tape on their doors and just to inform people of what he was trying to do. And it was wildly successful. He had that several years in a row. And so anyway, I guess to answer your question, I have found that one of the best ways to overcome entitlement is to give people opportunities to practice financial principles, you know, basic financial management with these things. And that can look different with everybody. I mean, it could be.

John H Nebeker (27:47.252)
I guess the bottom line is you want to do something with them that they're interested in. And then something that's easy for them to do that's hopefully local, you know, right? This year, so we're back in Utah now, and my kids are bugging me for other things that they want us to buy. you know what I said to them, it's like, you need to create some flyers and offer to go around the neighborhood to do snow removal when the snow starts to hit, you know, or maybe some other things that you could do to help out around the neighborhood. So those are some ideas that you can have.

Dr. Travis Parry (28:15.987)
Yeah. You know, I also love in your book that you mentioned, Hey, no start small put, whatever you have in a shoe box and you started in a basic, you know, a bank account or something that, that your family can know like, this is our family bank and there's rules around it and start teaching young. I hear, I hear that a lot, like, I've taught my kids, I've taught them really well. And if I was to pass away today, like they, they would be just fine. But you mentioned another thing that I want to bring up here and then we're going to.

John H Nebeker (28:22.603)
Yeah.

Dr. Travis Parry (28:45.675)
Uh, kind of switch gears is, you mentioned, well, Hey, when you were setting up your own trust, you're like, well, when should I, you know, get, these to my kids if I was to pass away on this trip and, know, in your own word, I'll let you talk about it, but this is soon seems to be a sentiment that I hear a lot from people is I want to reach outside the grave and be able to still teach them and direct them. Um, talk to us about, know, what you were feeling and how the family bank can help with that as well.

John H Nebeker (29:12.789)
Yeah, my very first exposure to the problems that inherited money presents was in my own situation. I alluded to it earlier, but my wife and I were headed to a three week trip to Europe. And we had a couple of kids at that point and we were concerned that if we died on this trip, who would take care of our children? hadn't designated guardians. So we talked to a state planning attorney that was in our neighborhood, very competent guy.

and just kind of told him what our assets were. We got things changed around, put the house in the trust, did a will in a trust, and advanced directives and whatnot. So I'm sitting in his office, signing my name literally to the trust document, and I get one signature in, and all of a sudden I start to feel really uncomfortable. And it didn't make any sense. So I dropped the pen, and I just sat there for a moment thinking, why am I feeling uneasy about this? This is what I tell everybody to do.

It's just prudent. So then I reached out to the attorney and I said, hey, am I missing something here? He was just there in the room. He's like, no, I don't think so. I said, remind me of what happens when our children grow to adulthood. After they've been raised by the guardians we designate and there's some money left over, because there probably would be. There'd be millions of dollars potentially if the money had been.

invested properly, which I'm sure it would buy by our family members that would take care of them and How do I make sure that my kids aren't gonna be hurt by this money? They said well, they'll be age 25 when the money is And they're entitled to receive it And so I said have you ever met an entitled 25 year old or 25 year old who makes bad financial decisions and he laughed and he said well Yeah, I guess that's right. Maybe we could push it to age 30 or age 35 and I was like

I've met people in their 60s and 70s that make poor financial decisions. It's not a function of age, so how do I make sure that this money actually helps them? Because I got a feeling that I'm creating a problem for my kids when I do this. And so we explored some possibilities, and a lot of them just felt like they were putting handcuffs on the next generation, like, you can have this much money, but no more. It'll be like an annuity. It'll come in on every day, every year on your birthday, and it'll be a set amount, and it'll never change, or whatever.

John H Nebeker (31:37.558)
Or another idea was when we can match their W-2. That would be an incentive for them to work hard and then we'll just match that and whatever. But I'm like, still free money. You know, they didn't do anything for it. So what I walked away with was there's gotta be a better way, but I didn't know what it was. So I ended up signing the document as it was and then that was that. A few years later, an attorney reached out to me in my office out of nowhere, never met the guy, and he just said, I need your help. I'm creating a family bank.

and I need your financial tools to do it. And so I got to meet him in person and I asked, what is this family bank idea? He said, well, it's this ingenious way that I can put money aside for myself, for my needs, for my retirement, for my investments, for my emergencies. And in my lifetime, I can use these surplus funds to help my children and grandchildren accomplish their goals, like buying a house or getting through college or starting a business or.

investing in real estate, whatever it may be. And then the best part is that this system can go on beyond my children and grandchildren's life because it gets passed down through a family tradition and through this legal framework of a trust that can continue perpetually up to a thousand years in the state of Utah. My mind was blown and I said, there's something here. I could feel it. And so then I went to the library.

Dr. Travis Parry (33:03.017)
Yeah.

John H Nebeker (33:05.375)
I bought every book off of Amazon and other places that I could find that even mentioned the idea of generational wealth or the family bank. And I only found a handful of books and articles that even mentioned it. And the ones that I did find, I read over and over and over. And eventually I decided that there was much more out there and I needed to research it. And what I didn't realize also at the time is that I had clients for decades with my dad.

that had already been practicing these principles. didn't call it a family bank, but they had already been doing these kinds of joint financial activities with their kids and grandkids, and it was very successful. And so I ended up taking a lot of notes, interviewing them, researching extensively for a couple years, and the result was this book. And, you know, I didn't write the book to make money. I really didn't. I still haven't broken even on it. I'm not a popular author. It was never a New York Times bestseller.

Dr. Travis Parry (33:38.442)
you

John H Nebeker (34:03.223)
It got a few awards for sales and whatnot, but the purpose of the book was to get the information out to people. And hopefully they would have what they need. What I actually found was that most people wanted some additional guidance. That the book was enough to sort of get them interested in it. And some of them talked to their advisors, to their attorneys and whatnot, and did things on their own. sure, I know there are many that have.

Dr. Travis Parry (34:05.94)
Sure.

John H Nebeker (34:30.165)
But many of them have reached out to me individually and said, hey, can you walk me through this? And there is a way that I can help people walk through it. But yeah, it's really exciting. That's how the book came about.

Dr. Travis Parry (34:41.546)
But yeah, speaking to a lot of people about my third book about, know, family finance and how, you know, the struggle of, not entitling, but enabling your children. Right. And long after you're gone. So you hit a lot on these really key components here, John today. And, you know, you also talk about a concept and that is that some people actually are living these concepts. They know it to be true. They've somehow stumbled upon it or their grandparents taught them or.

You know, whatever, but, they don't have it officially put together, right? I know that's something that you do and that's something that, you know, full disclosure, that we've, we were doing together on some cases right now, with clients. But that said, there's no reason if you already have the mentality, have the tools, like get the tools, use them, put them together for good use. And, know, be able to enable your children and your grandchildren, to continue this perpetual.

you know, wealth building tool for, for literally thousands of years as you've mentioned. So thank you for that. you also segue really well right into the family bank book. know, you are fantastic in that book. You go in really great depth. Like I've listened to it several times, even though I messed up on the Rothschilds versus Rockefellers and Vanderbilt, the concepts they're all there. They all are mentioned. Yeah.

John H Nebeker (36:00.664)
They're all mentioned by the way, the Rothschilds are in there.

Dr. Travis Parry (36:04.962)
Sorry about that. But, I love this example of like these two different families, the Vanderbilt and the Rockefellers, like how different the one has been able to keep the legacy and the wealth, not to enable them or entitle them, but to enable them right to have opportunities and grow. and not just give it all away, but to, know, to really have this plan of action to, move with your family. So

If you want to know more, obviously you can reach out to me. You can reach out to John. John, if they want to get the book, where can they go to get the book? I know it's probably on Amazon, but do have a website or somewhere else you might want to lead them?

John H Nebeker (36:41.185)
Yeah, so it's available at all major booksellers, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, all that. We have the website, right now it's under construction to be honest, but it's on its way. It's TFBstrategies.com. TFB as in the family bank. TFBstrategies.com is our website. And yeah, it's kind of an ongoing mission to inform people of this. There's actually a nonprofit that we,

have been contacted by that does a lot of the training and education for free and that's thefamilybank.org and so there's some great stuff over there they have a YouTube channel where they've actually taken my book and and just like taken the chapters and made them into short videos of each chapter with sort of an introduction and

So, I mean, there's a lot more information in the book, but if you're looking for just a video primer of all that, that's a place that people can go. But yeah, like I said, there's other books out there. You know, I don't have a monopoly on the idea. I just want people to hear about it as much as possible. And if I can help them do it themselves, you know, on their own or with my help, I'm happy either way. But yeah, it's great.

Dr. Travis Parry (38:01.905)
Love it. Thanks for sharing your time, your knowledge, your expertise here on the show. It's great to have any last, comments statements, not your last words. hate saying that because of you like, my gosh, you know, this is it. but you know, anything else that we missed out that you want to touch on before we end this segment.

John H Nebeker (38:21.303)
Yeah, I would just say the thing that really stirs me the most about this is this is kind of future family work. You know, we all know that we have issues and opportunities in our families and we're all busy doing a lot of stuff with them and trying to fix relationships. And again, money is a tool that you can actually use to help do that. I talk about that a little bit in the book. But there's a terrific opportunity here.

for families to be independent and they create these family banks as a bulwark against economic crises. They can help each other in good times and bad. You you wouldn't have to rely on government or charities when there's a problem. You can actually look to your family for help. And it's not necessarily your direct family members, because sometimes that can get little dicey. Most of us have lent money or had money lent to us from a family member.

and either they haven't paid it back or we haven't paid it back or, you know, it created friction in their relationship. You can bypass all of that with a family bank. Because then you have this entity and you have this group of people who are family members, but there's enough of them that it's somewhat objective and then they can help you figure out what you need to do. It's a terrific opportunity. I know I've said that a bunch, but it can fix relationships and it's just the wise use, like you said earlier, of that idea, that perfect word.

of stewardship and being able to use the time and the resources and the blessings that people have received to help as many people as possible starting with the ones that you love the most. This is the best way to do it.

Dr. Travis Parry (40:07.603)
Well said. Thank you so much for encapsulating all of that summarizing and giving us some good nuggets to think about and to ponder on again, grab John's book, the family bank. It's an excellent read. highly recommend it and you won't go wrong. you know, investigating yourself, asking the right questions. you, you'll find a lot of the questions are answered throughout the book. Definitely reach out to him or contact us here at www.

BalancedDads.com. Looking forward to more from you, John. And again, thanks for spending your time here today.

John H Nebeker (40:44.105)
Anytime. Thank you, Travis.

Dr. Travis Parry (40:46.383)
Absolutely. Remember everyone, live life on purpose together. Thanks.



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